#Patient File: ( Astrotrain )

[verdigrisprowl]

Springer’s spark

Hook calls Tarantulas to advise him on how best to prepare his patient for his coming surgery.

Hook

For all that Hook cared, Tarantulas could rot. Him and his stupid, pretentious, self-obsessed, "ooh look at me I actually got to go to medical school, and I wasted everything I learned there on fusing myself with vermin" slag. Which was why, even after he'd looked over the specs for Tarantulas's proposed spark augmentation procedure, he'd let it sit there instead of comming Tarantulas back. If it were up to him, he would've KEPT making Tarantulas wait. Make the bug call HIM and beg for HIS opinion. Tarantulas should be so lucky as to be graced with his expert opinion.

But—Prowl had come up to Hook. And he'd asked if Hook had looked over the files, and if he'd talked to Tarantulas about them yet.

Long Haul had knocked a fist-shaped dent into Prowl's head a month ago, and Prowl hadn't peeped a word to Hook about getting it repaired. He didn't care about his own damage. But he'd cared enough about fixing Springer to drag himself out of his room and ask Hook about it.

If it mattered that much to Prowl...

Well. Hook guessed he was calling Tarantulas now, wasn't he?

Ping.

Tarantulas

Give it another day or two – or even a matter of hours, really – and Tarantulas would have commed Hook himself, just like the sulky widget wanted. Sure, Tarantulas did have plenty of other things to occupy his time, but this was Ostaros they were talking about here. (No, Springer. It was Springer now. Rgh.) Tarantulas wasn’t about to wait a couple hundred years for a reply, not when Springer’s health was on the line.

Thankfully he didn’t have to wait any longer though; neither did Hook, who got a prompt ping mirrored back at him, then a comm.

«Ah, Hook – do tell me this is about the spark augmentation files?»

Hook

«Yeah. S'about them.»

And then silence. He might have commed Tarantulas first, but he was still going to give Tarantulas the chance to ASK him about them first, before he just had to OFFER his opinion. Little victories.

Tarantulas

A beat. «What about them? I presume you found everything satisfactory and agree we’re ready to proceed?»

Hook

Ah, there it was. The moment he'd been waiting for. Tarantulas asking for his opinion. He basked in it.

And then he said, «Naw. It sucks.»

Tarantulas

Tarantulas had only asked Hook’s opinion because Prowl had made it mandatory, mind you. Whatever Hook was basking in was pretty artificially produced.

Tarantulas’s scoff, however, was not artificial in the least. « Hyah, funny, very funny. How droll. Go on, what is it?»

Hook

«He ain't gonna be able to handle the process. You know why we only made Phase Sixers outta point one percenters? Anything less woulda died. Can't take the strain. And you ain't done slag to protect the Wrecker from that strain.»

Tarantulas

«Wh – that’s the whole point of the augmentation process – to protect Springer! You’re talking nonsense – and if you’re not, I – well, go on, but be prepared to supply sufficiently-hard evidence and receipts to back up your claims.»

Hook

«Yeah? Well it ain't gonna protect nothing if you're doin' it like that. Listen, half the files on the whole Phase Sixer project are top secret classified—and all the mechs that coulda DEclassified them are either dead or switched sides—so you're gonna have to trust what I remember hearin' people say about it, and what I heard was them sayin' Megatron couldn't take the process. MEGATRON couldn't take it. And his spark output has been augmented as far as we could take it. Just augmentin' Springer's spark ain't gonna do the job.»

Tarantulas

Trust Hook? Hhmph.

«If you’re quite sufficiently knowledgeable about Megatron’s spark augmentations and their apparent shortcomings, I’d love to hear about what they might be and how my proposed plans for augmenting Springer’s spark - tried and true ones, mind you - are apparently going to fall sorely short as well.»

Hook

«Uh-uh. Doctor-patient confidentiality. I ain’t tellin’ you about Megatron’s spark.

«Yeah, your augmentations might be tried and true on somethin’, but it ain’t ununtrium. I ain’t sayin’ they won’t give your Wrecker’s spark some extra punch, but punch ain’t what you need. You need shielding.

«I’ll tell ya something that will work—dark matter fission cell in his power core. Sixshot was on the border of bein’ compatible so we stuck one in him, and he had no problems takin’ the ununtrium. Considerin’ the likely stats Springer’s spark’s got—Prowl’s explained all that to me—he’s probably already livin’ past the peak of his potential, size-wise; combine that with the fact that he’ll be comin’ straight outta life support with a zero point, and to get him through the ununtrium process he might need two, maaaybe three fission cells. His chest’s big, as long as he don’t plan on takin’ the Matrix he’s got plenty of room.»

Tarantulas

«Doctor-patient confidentiality,» Tarantulas repeated incredulously. Those were definitely words he hadn’t expected to hear out of Hook’s mouth.

…Words which were followed by even more words he hadn’t expected. Tarantulas spluttered for a moment as he found his mental footing.

«That’s absolutely preposterous! There’s no way I’m putting a fission cell in Springer’s chest, let alone three of them! Besides, there’s absolutely no reason why my proposal would be anything less than highly effective, since it would in essence raise his internal defenses and extend his spark’s peak potential on a fundamental level, instead of throwing external patches on a core that’s not damaged in the first place.»

Hook

«Yeah. Doctor-patient confidentiality. Maybe you skipped that lesson, ya dropout.» Which Hook still resents him for.

«There sure as frag is a reason, or I wouldn’t’ve brought it up! Boostin’ his spark’s output is worthless on this procedure. The fact that you used it successfully to let a bot perform mass-displacement sequences don’t mean nothin’, that procedure’s easy enough that if I wanted I could talk Astrotrain through doin’ the surgery on his own spark over the phone. All mass-displacement needs to work is a lotta spare energy. This is ununtrium. Ununtrium attacks the system.

«You’re basically givin’ his spark a blaster and sayin’ “if he ever needs to defend himself, he can just shoot it so fast the blasts form an energy shield. That’s slag. A strong offense ain’t a substitute for a solid defense, civilian—and that’s all you’re givin’ him.»

Tarantulas

«Did you even read any of the text I sent with the schematics? It’s - it’s hardly just spare energy - the effects on the spark once it’s incorporated -»

Tarantulas cut himself off with a loud, indignant hiss. «You know nothing about the process in actuality. And to the pits with you and your battle metaphors, this isn’t war, it’s an immensely delicate and tenuous dance if anything, both with the surgery and with the ununtrium binding! If you knew scrap about the binding anyhow you’d have provided the information upfront - and if you actually do and didn’t say - you’re veritably -»

No, no threats, not toward people Prowl would get defensive over. Tarantulas had been there and suffered the darkly disapproving consequences already. A shaking silence followed as he struggled to rein himself in.

«I’m not putting a fission cell in Springer’s chest. End of story. »

Hook

«Yeah, yeah, yeah, I read the damn thing, I get how it works. It’s not gonna be enough. You’re STILL gonna be puttin’ the burden on his spark instead of shielding his spark from the burden.»

Hook bristled defensively. «Like FRAG do I know nothing! Maybe I can’t build the damn machine that makes it happen but I sure as hell know what it does to a body! To the pits with you and your dance metaphors, you’re about to drown his spark in radiation and you can’t waltz out of that.»

Stupid, arrogant know-it-all. He knew how to build a fancy machine that could spray star sludge on someone's protoform and suddenly he knew Hook's job better than Hook himself. «Fine. Your patient, your funeral. Ain't my problem if you think you know more than the expert.»

Tarantulas

«That’s not the way it works. » Another hiss, but Tarantulas was done with details. Just – done.

«Well, it’s not my problem if you’re deluding yourself into believing you’re – that you’re the only expert.» He’d been about to say “that you’re an expert in anything,” but he could restrain himself just enough not to ruin the situation entirely.

«Yes, thank you, he is my patient, my – the fragging opposite of a funeral. He’s - he's Ostaros. » From Eostre, new life, after all. Springer was going to awaken anew, and Tarantulas was going to see to it that he did so without a damn fission cell in his chest.

Hook

«He ain't Ostaros no more. That's your problem, bug. You think the fact you made him means you know everything about him—from his name to how it's best to upgrade him. Ya don't. And you're gonna get him killed thinkin' ya do.

«But that's gonna be on your head. All Prowl wanted me to do is give ya my opinion. I'm done here.»

Tarantulas

«He is Ostaros underneath all that plating, just like he was and always will be, whether anyone likes it or not! Which is why he's not only going to survive this, he's going to flourish, and I'm not letting you interfere with that. Primus, over my dead body.»

A growl. «You know, now that I think about it, it really must sting that Prowl only trusts you as a second opinion after a so-called 'bug' from a different universe.»

Hook

«So ya think that because ya named him, he'll definitely survive. Yeah. Uh-huh. That's definitely how medicine works.

«You're the scraphead that built him, ain't ya? You're the one that wants to fix him. Of course boss asked you first. It really must sting that boss don't trust you enough to be the ONLY opinion.»

Tarantulas

«See – I did build him, and that’s why I know he’ll survive. The name was merely subsequent.

«As for the matter of trust – the only reason Prowl is being this careful is because he cares so much about Ostaros that he’s the only reason Prowl agreed to work with me again in the first place! Which – yes, I’m aware that takes me down a couple notches in repute, but at least I have notches to be taken, unlike someone who’s wormed their way into Prowl’s life – Prowl’s head �� using disgustingly base circumstances that’ll – that –»

Tarantulas left off with something between a growl and a hiss. «I’m not – I'm not dignifying you with the privilege of this conversation. We’re obviously done here.»

Click.

Hook

«Wh— You think—? Hey! You think any of US asked for this? We didn't want it no more than—»

Too late. Tarantulas was off the line. Hook shouted at nothing, kicked his tool cabinet, and stomped out of his little medibay to shout up at Prowl's level. "Your stupid bug is a piece of slag!"

"You gave him your advice?"

"Yeah. Not that he deserves any of it."

"Thank you."

Hook grumbled something about how Prowl oughta thank him if he wanted to make it worth all that, and trudged over to flop down in front of the TV.

There. Duty done. Now he didn't have that weighing on his conscience. If Springer died and Prowl was upset, it was on Tarantulas's head.

[helliontwins]

Fan Fic Writer tag game

I was Stole from @fuzipenguin​ 

AO3 name: Verbophobic

Fandoms: Mostly transformers with others sprinkled in.

Number of fics: 53 posted to AO3. 111 on Ff.n and an innumerable count on google drive

Fic I spent the most time on: Not really sure. There’s a lot of fics ive done a lot of work on some i worked on for a month then stopped and picked up a year later. I’d most likely go with Plane Jane (Lost Boys David/Oc) as I will write a few chapters do major editing, post then wait a few months (or years) and continue.

Fic I spent the least time on: I think it would be Cruel Fate (Lucifer Cain/Oc ish) as it took on life of it’s own. 

Longest fic: Forever Mine DISCONTINUED! (Transformers Ironhide/Oc) (75407 words) Discontinued cus im very very very slowly rewriting it.

Shortest fic: Blanket Monster (One Piece Marco/Ace) (257 words) Just a small one shot.

Most hits: How To Properly Eat Breakfast (One Piece Marco/Ace) 4430 hits. WHich is a surprise to me.

Most kudos: Same as the last at 425

Most comment threads: Lost in the Wilderness (Transformers - Prowl/Sideswipe and Jazz/Sunstreaker) At 30 threads!

Favourite fic I’ve written: I’ll give 5 like the person i took this from. No order:  Never Kili Without Fili Nor Fili Without Kili (Hobbit- Kili, Fili {no ship})  Lost in the Wilderness (Transformers Prowl/Sideswipe and Jazz/Sunstreaker)  Plain Jane (Lost Boys David/Oc)  Flirting with Danger (Naruto Gaara/oc kinda ish)  The Sound of Shattering Glass (One Piece Marco/Ace Character death) 

Bonus Regretful Deals Sideswipe/Astrotrain, not posted!

Fic you want to rewrite/expand on: *sighs* Ok… listen… rewrite nothing, expand on pretty much everything I’ve ever written because I can count the number of completed fics on one hand while WIPs… well, let’s just say it’s not pretty.

Share a bit of a WIP or a story idea you’re planning on: Posting below the cut. Sideswipe the Virgin Pulls confetti popper. The uh most simple explanation i have is, I ‘borrowed’ the plot from Jane the virgin. Jane goes in for a pap smear, the gyno is having a hard break up, mixed up rooms, and artificially inseminates Jane instead of a different room. 

Tagging: Idk who writes things anymore D:

Entering the first exam room, First Aid skimmed the file on the door and glanced over the patient. Luckily, this folder had most of the correct papers filed within, enough that nothing struck him as odd, at least. Extracting a portion of the seeker’s spark went without a hitch, and First Aid instructed him to lay back and rest. He contained and secured the spark energy, then excused himself to bring it to the room listed in the file for the recipient.

This patient did give him pause as he confirmed the files. He thought it odd that a seeker was trying to spark up a grounder, especially such a large blue seeker with such a tiny red grounder. However, it wasn’t his place to say anything, and read enough of the first page of the grounder’s file to know that the transfer of energy would be a fair risk. There was a strong chance of reabsorption due to an unusual spark.

He greeted the grounder, setting the file aside, and got to work examining the small mech’s spark. He could see how there would be a risk as he took in the small size and low energy output of this spark. Carefully, he added the donor’s energy, as well as a concoction to promote acceptance without reabsorption. It seemed to take easily, despite the warnings in the file and his own observations, and he smiled warmly at his patient, hoping to ease some of the poor mech’s anxiety. “All done!” he chirped. He collected the containment unit and the patient file. “You’re free to leave as soon as you feel steady.” 

Sideswipe was quite confused but very, very, pleased at the lack of pain. He wondered what they had done differently after all this time, but he felt good - better than he ever had after an adjustment - and that was all he cared about.

The next room First Aid visited however was not as happy with his work. The file told him that this spark needed a readjustment, even though to Aid it seemed perfectly aligned. The black and purple seeker was not happy with the pain, but assumed that it was normal for a first time sparking, especially an artificial sparking. Hopefully it would be worth the pain, and this time his spark wouldn’t absorb the energy.

First Aid sent all his patients home, happy that things had gone without a hitch in Ratchet’s absence. At the end of his shift as he sank into his chair to finish the reports he knew his mentor would ask for, he pulled the day’s files close to review them… and his spark sank.